Notes from a Jersey Girl

by Lisa G Westheimer


The Bridal Shower: From the Side of the Bride

Boy do I have a treat for you, my pretties- a post from a guest contributor!!!  Welcome luxury travel journalist Andrea Berkholtz of  You may recall that last May we fell down the rabbit hole together at her Alice in Wonderland themed bridal shower.  I thought it would be great fun to get the event from her perspective.  Take it away, Andrea!

Bridal showers…like many of us, these frilly, sometimes frivolous-seeming events are not something I have much experience with. Having only been to two, I was the kind of girl to be mildly excited but to also ask myself ‘does this mean I have to wear a sundress, drink tea and eat finger sandwiches and shit?’ I always met these shower invitations with a smile but sneaking suspicions I’d be bored to death.  That is, until I was thrown my own.


First I should probably introduce myself to you, the fine readers. My name is Andrea and I’m coming to you live on Notes From A Jersey Girl as the guest poster this week! You might remember this hilarious post from Lisa about a trip to Colorado and a certain bridal shower she attended. Well, yep, you guessed it, that was mine and I’m here today to tell you what it was like from the side of the bride.

So I guess I should start this by saying I’m not really very girlie. No seriously, even my voice is about three octaves lower than it should be but it matches my typical shorts, tank and sandals look so just roll with it, cool? Being that I’m not super girlie, I was apprehensive about what my bridal shower would turn out to be as I had pretty much just told my best friend, ‘whatever you want, just make it rad.’ I had visions (or nightmares, more like) of horrific pink tutus and girlie squealing and the very thought of being the center of attention had my armpits moist with trepidation. Luckily, there didn’t end up being much to worry about cause my maid of honor was a badass.

The only input I did offer was deciding on the theme. Being a weirdo, I had toyed with the idea of a Harry Potter theme or perhaps Game of Thrones but then I realized this was about me marrying the love of my life, not casting spells or cutting off heads. Yea, ok, maybe a little girlie was good? We decided on Alice In Wonderland, which I figured gave my friends enough creative leeway to make it unique and quirky, which they of course delivered.

When I got the invitation, much like Lisa, I was initially wondering if maybe I had accidentally dropped some acid because this thing was all over the place! (Ok…maybe my maid of honor had too much wine in the design process or something  cause the damn thing was impossible to read/understand). I didn’t expect following up with people to see if they knew the correct date/time of the shower as part of the process but hey, I love my girls and appreciate the design effort, so I was happy to help.



My eyes, oh gosh my eyes!!!


Shopping isn’t exactly in my wheelhouse either so picking out a white dress for this party drove me to such insanity that I eventually said ‘screw it’, flipped that tradition on its head, and went for black instead…which let’s be honest, most of us look better in black anyways. I also knew that everyone would be making, buying or bringing fun hats to go with the Alice in Wonderland theme but that part was left up to my amazonian bridesmaid, Bixby, so aside from the dress all I had to do was show up and party.

The day of the shower arrived and I was so nervous my palms were sweating (again, what is it with me and sweating?). My husband-to-be was kind enough to drop me off and smart enough not to linger for the avalanche of girly noises that were about to descend on the house. Right when I walked in the door I was floored by all the amazing decorations. Playing card streamers, masks, cute signage, paper flowers, amazing food…my friends had NAILED THIS SHIT. It was girlie without being too girlie. It was cute without being too cutesy….and mother of god, there was booze. YES!


My mom’s a pro with a glue gun, like Lisa said!



When I arrived, I was presented with my special hat, which still sits on display in my closet today because the darn thing is just so amazing. There are hidden charms behind the massive plumages of feathers and the two little doors on the front even open to reveal a picture of me and the hubs getting engaged (SQUEEEEEE, HOW CUTE!!!!). I cried of course, as I am wont to do…even though I consider myself less-feminine than most, a good gesture will bring a tear to my eye at the drop of a hat….in this case, literally the drop of a hat into my hands.

Cocktails, cookies, and a cacophony of laughs later, we played a game where there were underwear attached to a clothesline and I had to guess who brought what panties to the party. Mind you, some of them were horrific, and I say that in the best possible way. While there were a few pairs that I have indeed kept, I got the biggest hoot out of the ugly ones, specifically the pair Lisa brought that I decided I just HAD to try on over my dress. Thanks for that, vodka!


After the panty game, it was present time. And I hope to God nobody else who was at the shower ever gets a gander at this because for the most part I only remember a few of the gifts. (Soooorrry!) There was the usually bridal lingerie but I had seen, NAY, zeroed in on a large blue box the second I arrived at the party. My heart jumped and I think we can all agree that we know exactly what a robin’s egg blue box means. Tiffanys! I saved that box for last for a reason. I’ve never gotten anything from Tiffanys. Like, ever. When I opened it I felt my face grow hot with heat because I knew what would happen next. Cue the tears. It was a beautiful pitcher set with glasses, I WAS A REAL WOMAN NOW! I instantly pictured myself, the upper crust of society, pouring out champagne punch to all my well-heeled friends. Once the shock faded, I kept my wits about me and ran in for a big hug from Lisa ( I promise I’m not fawning over her gift because it’s her blog, it really was the standout present!).


After gifts, the cocktails kept flowing and then the goodbyes began. The shower overall was the picture-perfect day to spend with my friends and to relax and enjoy the moment. And c’mon, you know that after saying audios to the older folks, my band of Amazonian beauties and I took on Downtown in our Mad Hatter garb and TORE.IT.UP.

When it was all over, I thought to myself “The shower went perfect, it was everything I wanted and I thought that was going to be impossible.” In the words of the Mad Hatter…‘Only if you believe it is.’